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First Comes Love by Tom Rasmussen
£9.99
Available
Product Ref. (e.g. ISBN, SKU)
9781526653154
Published:
21 Jul 2022
Format:
Paperback
Number of pages:
288 pages
Dimensions:
198x129x22mm
Weight:
0.200kgs
Author:
Tom Rasmussen finds themselves straddling two camps, that of their Northern, working class family for whom marriage is the centrepiece of life, and that as a male-bodied, non-binary queer in a relationship with a man. Through journeys to wildly different weddings ranging from the most traditional to the unrecognizably unorthodox, visits to wedding planners, interviews of the much-married, those who have questioned their decision to marry over lockdown, or those who would never consider matrimony, these incisive witty and often moving essays look at marriage as an achievement, a compromise, a selling-out, and a practical solution. They examine what marriage means, along the whole spectrum of sexuality, for the working class, the middle class, the upper class and what the future looks like for marriage, the most historic and universal of institutions.
'Bitingly funny, infectiously inquisitive and ferociously sharp. Adored!' ATTITUDE
'A fascinating interrogation' GRAZIA
'An incisive, witty and moving look at marriage - as an achievement, a compromise, a selling-out, a practical solution' REFINERY29
It was one thing to get married when your parents, your neighbours, your community insisted on it, when a sacred union for heterosexuals was not just one option but the only option. It's quite another to keep doing it in when free of that societal and religious pressure. What is the allure of an institution grounded in patriarchy, in elitism, in white supremacy in the West, an institution that invalidated all but one kind of love till quite recently? Why do so many of us fight against these social ills while also posting pictures of proposals on Instagram? Is it possible to be married while subverting the institution by doing it one's own way, or is marriage having the last laugh after all?
Tom Rasmussen comes from a Northern, working class family, for whom marriage in the centrepiece of life. They are also a male-bodied, non-binary queer person in a relationship with a man.
Journeying through wildly different weddings, visits to wedding planners, interviews with the much-married, those who have questioned their decision to marry, and those who would never consider matrimony, this is an incisive, witty and moving look at marriage - as an achievement, a compromise, a selling-out, a practical solution. Tom Rasmussen examines what marriage means across the spectrum of sexuality and class, and what the future looks like for this most historic and universal of institutions.
'An incisive, compassionate probing of the pleasures and pitfalls of marriage ... A deft deconstruction of normativity today' DAZED
'Tom Rasmussen is a smart and accomplished storyteller ... Anyone - queer or straight - who's considering marriage, or for that matter anyone who's deeply in love should read this unputdownable book' KATE BORNSTEIN
'I love Tom Rasmussen and adore their writing' TRAVIS ALABANZA
'An interrogation and an investigation ... A deeply funny and optimistic read' JUNO ROCHE
About the Author: Tom Rasmussen is a Northerner based in London. When out of drag, they are contributing editor at Dazed Beauty, LOVE Magazine and Refinery29, and a regular contributor to the Independent and i-D. Their work has also been featured in Vice, Broadly, Tank and the Gay Times. In 2018 they were named an LGBT trailblazer by The Dots and one of the voices of now for i-D. Tom also forms half of the radical queer punk band ACM. Their first book, Diary of a Drag Queen, was longlisted for the Polari First Book Prize 2020. They live in London.@tomglitter
| Number of pages | 288 |
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| First Item | 2 Items & Over | |
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| UK | £3.75 | £5.00 |
| EU | £15.00 | £30.00 |
| USA & Canada | £30.00 | £50.00 |
| Rest of the World | £45.00 | £60.00 |
| Collect in Store | free | free |
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